Most embarrassing moments~By Kyle

I don't know what it is with our family, but we love telling our most embarrassing moments over and over. I guess in a way we wear it as a badge of honor, as we each think that we have the best story of our embarrassment, or maybe it's just some cheap comedy. Now that I think about it, possibly this is just another quirk about our rather strange family, but the laughs that come after one of our family's "classic" embarrassment stories is told make it all worth it . . . at the cost of one of us who would rather have that certain moment be forgotten. :0) So, what are your most (appropriate) embarrassing moments? Don't worry, we won't laugh (yeah right!). Here are two of mine that, regrettably, come to mind:

 My first embarrassing moment happened in a place you wouldn't expect, a San Francisco boardwalk. I was having such a great time there . . .  right up until the moment my family will never let me forget. My little brothers had spotted a carousel on that boardwalk we walked down that evening, and after a good amount of pleading, they had won my parents over. As I watched their happy little faces as they rode on that carousel a few minutes later, I felt happy that they were enjoying their trip around and around in pointless circles on plastic horses so much. Feeling bored, and still watching my bros, I reached down to the cup holder of our stroller and picked up Mommy's latte. I had barely taken a sip when I realized my mistake, and the rest, as they say, is history. That was not our stroller that I had pilfered the latte from, neither was the latte my mom's. In the blur of confusion and embarrassment that followed, I distinctly remember the shocked look on the young mom's face as she saw a stranger nonchalantly sipping her latte. It is fabled by my family that I still had whipped cream on my upper lip as a torrent of sincere apologies flowed from both me and my parents. As far as I remember, the shocked young mom took it all in stride, even shrugging off the money offered to pay for the "spoiled" latte, but needless to say, I couldn't leave that boardwalk quickly enough.

My second most prevalent embarrassment happened but a few weeks ago. I had just finished a trapshoot out at Morton and was ravenously hungry on my way back home. I stopped at the Chevron gas station in Morton to get me some grub, and that is when it happened.  I found a 1.50 bag of my favorite jalapeño chips and made myself a self-serve hot dog, making sure to glob plenty of ketchup all over it (yeah, the lunch of champions). Maybe it was my hunger on steroids that helped along this moment, or maybe it was just a simple oversight, but whatever the case, I was in for a whopper of a surprise when I went up to pay for my food.
     Still oblivious to my impending doom, I set my lunch of champions down on the counter and reached for my wallet, smiling to the little Hispanic cashier as I did. But when I opened my wallet, I was in for my first shock  . . . I didn’t have any cash. I should have known, for I had used all my cash to pay for my trapshooting rounds. Now a little flustered, I still thought, No problem, I will just use my debit card! My confidence restored, I smiled again to the cashier (who was waiting patiently) as I turned over my wallet to get my card. My confidence was short-lived, though, because – Surprise, surprise! – I didn’t have my debit card, either. My mind suddenly flashed back to earlier in the day when I had bought something off the computer . . . and left my card outside my wallet. The palms of my hands sweating a little now, I again looked, almost desperately, over my wallet again. A faint glimmer of hope came over me as I found a check given to me for Christmas, but that hope was also short lived.
     “I don’t suppose this would work?” I asked the cashier, holding up the check. The cashier, who didn’t completely speak English, didn’t know, so she had to consult with another cashier at the store, who assured me that the check wouldn’t work. "Um, let me go look in my car," I said.
     I must admit that as I searched through our little Ford Focus, the thought of simply fleeing from the place crossed my mind. But no. I desperately searched the car, and I found a nickel--only a nickel. Throwing the nickel almost with disdain back into the car, as if it was causing the problem, I returned to the cashier. By now, another cashier had heard of my plight, and she said as I approached, "Don't worry about it; we loaned you the money for the hot dog and will return the chips." I made sure to thank them profusely.
     I am sure many hot dogs have been devoured in remarkable time, but none have been so unceremoniously downed as fast as I devoured that hot dog inside my car. I left within seconds. But alas, this story is not complete, for I still had to repay the loan next Saturday. You can imagine how fun that was. "Um, I bought-- well, I was going to buy-- a hot dog the last time I was here, but I didn't have any means to buy it, and the cashier loaned me the money to pay for it. Here is the 1.30$ back." Sigh, that was just great.